The Human Nesting Instinct
Neglect as Damaging for Kids as Abuse

The Virginity Dilemma

Kaya at Afropologe riffs on a recent New York Times magazine article on True Love Revolution.

True Love Revolution is self-described as a "on-sectarian student-run organization at Harvard College dedicated to the promotion of premarital sexual abstinence. We strive to present another option to our peers regarding sex-related issues, endorsing ideas of abstinence and chastity as a positive alternative for ethical and health reasons. "

According to the NYT, the club's ideas include:

... the belief that “ ‘safe sex’ is not safe”; that even the most effective methods of birth control can fail; that early sexual activity is strongly associated with all manner of terrible outcomes, from increased risk of depression to greater likelihood of marital infidelity, divorce and maternal poverty. Premarital abstinence, on the other hand, is held up by True Love Revolution as improving health, promoting better relationships and, best of all, enabling “better sex in your future marriage.”

I think the current leader of the organization makes an important point:

Conventional feminism, she explained, teaches that control of your body means the freedom to have sex without consequences — sex like a man. “I am an unconventional feminist,” Fredell said, in the sense that she asserts control by choosing not to have sex — by telling men, no, absolutely not.

I was very involved in feminist culture in the 70s, and we did sometimes lose sight of the idea that freedom of choice includes choosing not to do what others are doing.

Kaya takes issue with one student's comments about wanting to abstain from sex with her boyfriend so she won't become too bonded and then hurt if they break up.

I think this may be an oversimplification -- and so may True Love Revolution's concepts, and/or the article's -- but she is very funny and her post is worth a read. She helps define the contradictions and confusion we all face in our ultra-modern society.

BTW, the folks at Afropologe have a no-quoting policy for their blog, which seems awfully weird and unbloggy, but whatever.