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Get Over Romance! Please, please, please?

Still another article bemoaning the way "love" dies -- that is, the intense romantic euphoria at the beginning of love.

Sumiko Tan, writing in the The Star, knows about Helen Fisher's three stages of love: lust, attraction (AKA romance) and attachment. And yet, she still believes in and perpetuates modern society's emphasis on only the early stages. She writes,

We place the institution on a pedestal and cling to fairytale ideals and images even when all around us we see daily evidence of how married life can, in fact, be pretty dreary and dreadful, the grind of housework, finances to be managed, children’s homework to be supervised and just general petty marital annoyances.

Yet, when I hear that couples I know are divorcing, I always feel sad and even let down.

How can it be that if you’ve been lucky enough to find the love of your life (for you must have, to have married each other, right?), you can no longer bear to be in each other’s company? How can you let that love slip away?

Come on, girl. Instead of this slipping away, losing metaphor, let's think of a love relationship as, oh, how about a flower? The bud may seem like the prettiest and most desirable part to us, but that flower has plenty of work to do after the petals drop. It grows and evolves and bears fruit or seeds that can start a new life or nourish other lives.

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