A Practical Reason to Stall Sex
Evolution of Trusting Societies

Are Cuddle Parties Pathetic?

Samantha Bennett of the Pittsburg Post-Gazette is funny.  She disses The Boyfriend's Arm, a pillow that sleeps in for a real man, and then bemoans the popularity of Cuddle Parties.

It's come to this: People are so starved for affectionate touch that they will pay $20 or $30 (NYC pricing; yours may vary) to spend three hours sprawled on blankets and pillows with a roomful of strangers ... cuddling.

Bennett says that The Boyfriend's Arm targets women's deep need for stroking and physical contact -- one men don't share. I don't believe this is true. Men's bodies secrete oxytocin during orgasm and they probably do during other, softer forms of physical contact. But most articles focus on women and oxytocin, the "tend and befriend" response.

In any case, instead of saying, ain't it awful that we need to pay to go to cuddle parties, we should start looking at why this is so and how we could change our culture and child-rearing practices to enable us to give and receive human warmth naturally in the course of our days.

Bennett's column by way of Angelinger.